The Week We View - Apr. 5th

>South Korea has banned all sales of U.S. pistachios produced by Setton Farms due to possible salmonella contamination. Will Koreans soon have "Pissed Off Pistachio" protests in line with the Mad Cow demonstrations? I do have some concerns that Korean TV news magazine, PD Notebook, could again cause panic with a salmonella "documentary." They might alter the translation of "salmonella" as with Mad Cow. I can see it now --candlelight vigils in downtown Seoul protesting salmon.

>Demi Moore prevented a woman from committing suicide this week through the online social network, Twitter. I wish the woman well, but if you are following Demi Moore on Twitter, what do you really have to live for?

>The best Unintended Headlines on the Same Page entry comes from South Korea's English language daily, Chosun Ilbo. The first, on North Korea's imminent missile launch, "Monday 'Best Day' for N.Korea Rocket Launch" and then just down the page, a headline on new skyscraper construction: "Seoul's Skyline About to Be Transformed"

>Ask yourself: "What are the most liberal states in America?" California immediately comes to mind --New York and Hawaii would be on the list. Well, add a new one: Iowa. The State Supreme Court struck down a ban on same sex marriage yesterday. Who'da thunk it? And unlike California, the voters (in their infinite wisdom) can't overrule the court's opinion so easily. Not only must the voters overturn it, but it must be overturned by both houses in the state legislature. The earliest that could happen is 2012, and my guess is by that time Iowans will feel the same way about the issue as I do: Who cares?

>I was browsing Wikipedia about Iowa and saw that their official state slogan is "Life Changing." No argument here. Some other state slogans of interest: Alaska: "Beyond Your Dreams, Within Your Reach" Sarah Palin hopefully realizing the former and not the latter. Kansas: "There's no place like home." Saw that one coming didn't you? I would have thought "Kansas: Darwin not welcome," more appropriate or, better yet, "Kansas: Jesus Christ!" What about New Jersey? "Come see for yourself." That sounds like a trick. Texas: "Like a whole other country." I am sure nut case separatist Chuck Norris loves that. The best is my birth state, Maryland: "Seize the day off."

>The New York Mets have signed Garry Sheffield to a one year contract at the league minimum, $400,000, so he can hit one more home run and reach 500 for his career. A lifetime .292 hitter, big Shef deserves it --even if he did disgrace himself during those years playing for the Dodgers.

>The New York times printed a retraction this week for a caption that accompanied a photo showing a bleeding Tibetan man running from Chinese police last year. The retraction coming after the communist party mouthpiece, Xinhua, claimed that the police were protecting the man from rioters.

>American photo chain, Wolf Camera, announced it will close several locations as part of a bankruptcy proceeding. No word yet as to whether the sheep will pay more of their tax dollars for the bailout.

>The Brits are freaking out because Michelle Obama touched the Queen --a major breach of royal protocol. I remember when Her Majesty visited America several years ago, a portly black woman in the projects hugged her on national television. Some of the best entertainment in memory.

>A Christian group opposed to stem cell research is accusing President Obama of violating the constitutional rights of frozen embryos and "enslaving" them, like Nazis enslaved Jews during the Holocaust. Couldn't they be more creative with their accusations? Why don''t they say that Obama is treating frozen embryos like ice cream and compare him to a cannibal? Geez.

>The G20 circle jerk has been going on this week. Well over 100 people have been arrested during protests thus far. I admire their efforts, but a lot of good that is doing. Obama hailed the G20 summit as a "turning point," for an economic recovery. I am at the point where the thought of all those rich folks trying to save the world is turning my stomach.

>G20 protesters set fire to a Hotel in Strasbourg yesterday. In response, G20 leaders are planning to set fire to the International Youth Hostel.

>And finally: A chemical used for making rocket fuel was found in shipments of American baby formula this week. Parents were alerted when they noticed their sons had enormous erections. No, no, let me try another punchline: The manufacturer said the shipments were intended for North Korea whose leader, Kim Jong-il, has been babied by the West for several years.

Have a good week~